Some days I can’t comprehend what happened to my marriage. One day it worked and the next it just stopped. I feel like I’m slowly going into a depression. My husband doesn’t see it like I see it. He thinks that it’s all sunshine and rainbows but I don’t see that at all. The reason I don’t see it, is because of him. He doesn’t have a steady job so the bills aren’t getting paid. He’s a tattoo artist on the side so that doesn’t really pay and if it does it’s a little bit of money.
We went on a brief getaway to the house where we had our honeymoon to try and get back the flame that is lost. While we were there, we couldn’t stop fighting. I cried a bunch and told him how I felt. I just wanted to tell him, “look it’s not working,” but I couldn’t bring myself to say that. We tried to get a long as much as possible but was very unsuccessfull. When we got back we went back to our regular lifestyle and fell back into things. I then told him we should go to therapy. Then he said, “I thought we were good.” Hey just because I’m nice to you doesn’t mean that our marriage is working. Is it me or are men just stupid? Or shall I say some men.
I’m just tired of feeling depressed and I’m tired of worrying if we’re going to pay our mortgage all the time. I don’t see how he doesn’t understand that. I also do everything around the house. For example, I clean the house, I mow the front and back lawn, I clean out the cat boxes just to name a few. It’s just getting old. Tomorrow is our 3 year wedding anniversary and I don’t feel like celebrating at all.